Post by Goku Goku Gadget Saiyan on Jan 31, 2010 17:23:02 GMT -5
CHAPTER THE FIRST
IN WHICH THE PURPOSE OF MAN IS EXPLORED
Welcome, one and all!
To Let's Play
My favorite game in the entire series, hands down.
Let's put in my name!
My parents were a little eccentric.
It was mostly farmland. Wouldn't exactly call it a thrilling tourist spot.
Except for the castle, anyway.
Came complete with circling bats and all.
I'm still a bit confused as to how they made this part.
Hoo boy, strap in. We'll be seeing that all gameeeaf$$#@@(((1010
ARCHIVE BROKEN
DATA LOST
Time for the final stage!
Oh hey, it's that precariously placed tower from the beginning of the game. I remember that.
It's not a very long stage. Also, see that little block to the right of that lamp post?
Hit it.
It unveils MORE STAIRS
Oh god I LOVE STAIRS
And up there is...
MORE STAIRS OH GOD YES
And then a bunch of copper busts and fancy pots.
And inside those is a ton of loot. Including a Moon Rod and Badelaire!
A dark shield.
A firebrand!
A power of sire.
A pair of sunglasses!
A shield rod.
And a Heart Refresh.
ALL OF WHICH WE CAN'T USE! So that segment is entirely pointless!
Back down we go. Pretty nice place, really.
Man, that is a nice door. I mean look at that thing.
It's got like a face knocker. A face knocker!
Oh hi Dracula.
HERE IT IS GUYS
THE BEST LINES IN VIDEO GAME HISTORY
I'll take "Great" Apes for two hundred, Trebek.
'This primate is known for it's self-centeredness and depression.'
That is correct, Dracula!
Time for the final boss of the game!
This is honestly one of the easiest Dracula fights in the entire series.
Like always, his first form has him teleporting around and shooting fireballs. The fireballs can be scattered by hitting them, although you can jump them if you do it precisely right.
Occasionally, he'll fire these bigass meteor fireballs. You can't hit these, so you have to duck the first one and jump the second.
If you're good enough, you can get three hits in before he teleports each time.
After about fifteen hits or so, PLAY TIMES OVER.
TRANSFOOOOOOOOOOOOOORM
This form is just as easy.
He can jump, which is easy to avoid.
Shoot fireballs at you, which is the hardest to avoid...
And whatever the hell he does here. I think it was a third attack that they really just tacked on there. He does it very rarely, and he just jumps straight up, dropping these green fireball things. It's probably his easiest move to avoid. Just don't move.
He goes down very easily.
"THIS CANNOT BE!"
So after a cool little picture burning effect that I couldn't capture because the emulator glitches out, we get this little story thing.
WORDSWORDSWORDS NO ONE CARES
So yeah, Castlevania.
This is our real protagonist, Alucard.
He will never run this fast ever again.
Hop on in, folks.
And welcome to the game!
The first enemy in the game. It's called a Warg, taken directly from Tolkien.
They burst into flames when you kill them. Fun.
Alright, so Alucard only has one running speed, somewhere between a run and walking that starts with a fairly ridiculous cape batting-away. So Konami opted for a bizarre control in where Alucard does some sort of backward dash when you press the triangle button. It's the fastest way to move around, at least for now.
Ridiculous as it may be, it does look pretty cool.
More wargs.
SON OF A WHORE! After walking through the first hallway for a bit, you get accosted by an endless stream of zombies.
Also notice my health. In a normal run, that'd be about 70.
They give out the first few level ups like candy.
This outline effect means that his mana was recharged. Which means now I can do this.
Down downright right IN YOUR FACE, WARG.
This room inexplicably has a big mass of rock in the middle of it!
The inexplicable rock also has a big mass of pot roast in it.
There really isn't any point to this little area thing.
Down here is the Merman pool. It spawns Mermen endlessly.
Next room is more hallway!
More wargs.
And a turkey embedded on the foot of a short staircase. What?
FLOATING SCYTHE
WHAT
Oh it's just Death. Hi, Death!
Hey man. Check out all this sweet gear I got.
It's got my name on each of them and everything.
And this sword? Family heirloom, man.
Sure, my necklace could be a bit cooler, but still. It's good.
Plus, dude, this hat scares the crap out of everyone.
And my cape. My cape, whoa. It GLOWS. That's like better than anything Dracula could ever wear.
But man, this shield is probably the best thing. I could WRECK everything with this thing.
See ya, Death. Keep in touch.
WAIT WHAT
DUDE
WHAT THE crap, MAN
ASSHOOOOLE
And now I got nothing. Ouch.
Alright, that's enough for the first update. Next time!
Skeletons! Degraded bosses! And cubes! CUBES!
IN WHICH THE PURPOSE OF MAN IS EXPLORED
Welcome, one and all!
To Let's Play
My favorite game in the entire series, hands down.
Let's put in my name!
My parents were a little eccentric.
It was mostly farmland. Wouldn't exactly call it a thrilling tourist spot.
Except for the castle, anyway.
Came complete with circling bats and all.
I'm still a bit confused as to how they made this part.
Hoo boy, strap in. We'll be seeing that all gameeeaf$$#@@(((1010
ARCHIVE BROKEN
DATA LOST
Time for the final stage!
Oh hey, it's that precariously placed tower from the beginning of the game. I remember that.
It's not a very long stage. Also, see that little block to the right of that lamp post?
Hit it.
It unveils MORE STAIRS
Oh god I LOVE STAIRS
And up there is...
MORE STAIRS OH GOD YES
And then a bunch of copper busts and fancy pots.
And inside those is a ton of loot. Including a Moon Rod and Badelaire!
A dark shield.
A firebrand!
A power of sire.
A pair of sunglasses!
A shield rod.
And a Heart Refresh.
ALL OF WHICH WE CAN'T USE! So that segment is entirely pointless!
Back down we go. Pretty nice place, really.
Man, that is a nice door. I mean look at that thing.
It's got like a face knocker. A face knocker!
Oh hi Dracula.
HERE IT IS GUYS
THE BEST LINES IN VIDEO GAME HISTORY
I'll take "Great" Apes for two hundred, Trebek.
'This primate is known for it's self-centeredness and depression.'
That is correct, Dracula!
Time for the final boss of the game!
This is honestly one of the easiest Dracula fights in the entire series.
Like always, his first form has him teleporting around and shooting fireballs. The fireballs can be scattered by hitting them, although you can jump them if you do it precisely right.
Occasionally, he'll fire these bigass meteor fireballs. You can't hit these, so you have to duck the first one and jump the second.
If you're good enough, you can get three hits in before he teleports each time.
After about fifteen hits or so, PLAY TIMES OVER.
TRANSFOOOOOOOOOOOOOORM
This form is just as easy.
He can jump, which is easy to avoid.
Shoot fireballs at you, which is the hardest to avoid...
And whatever the hell he does here. I think it was a third attack that they really just tacked on there. He does it very rarely, and he just jumps straight up, dropping these green fireball things. It's probably his easiest move to avoid. Just don't move.
He goes down very easily.
"THIS CANNOT BE!"
So after a cool little picture burning effect that I couldn't capture because the emulator glitches out, we get this little story thing.
WORDSWORDSWORDS NO ONE CARES
So yeah, Castlevania.
This is our real protagonist, Alucard.
He will never run this fast ever again.
Hop on in, folks.
And welcome to the game!
The first enemy in the game. It's called a Warg, taken directly from Tolkien.
They burst into flames when you kill them. Fun.
Alright, so Alucard only has one running speed, somewhere between a run and walking that starts with a fairly ridiculous cape batting-away. So Konami opted for a bizarre control in where Alucard does some sort of backward dash when you press the triangle button. It's the fastest way to move around, at least for now.
Ridiculous as it may be, it does look pretty cool.
More wargs.
SON OF A WHORE! After walking through the first hallway for a bit, you get accosted by an endless stream of zombies.
Also notice my health. In a normal run, that'd be about 70.
They give out the first few level ups like candy.
This outline effect means that his mana was recharged. Which means now I can do this.
Down downright right IN YOUR FACE, WARG.
This room inexplicably has a big mass of rock in the middle of it!
The inexplicable rock also has a big mass of pot roast in it.
There really isn't any point to this little area thing.
Down here is the Merman pool. It spawns Mermen endlessly.
Next room is more hallway!
More wargs.
And a turkey embedded on the foot of a short staircase. What?
FLOATING SCYTHE
WHAT
Oh it's just Death. Hi, Death!
Hey man. Check out all this sweet gear I got.
It's got my name on each of them and everything.
And this sword? Family heirloom, man.
Sure, my necklace could be a bit cooler, but still. It's good.
Plus, dude, this hat scares the crap out of everyone.
And my cape. My cape, whoa. It GLOWS. That's like better than anything Dracula could ever wear.
But man, this shield is probably the best thing. I could WRECK everything with this thing.
See ya, Death. Keep in touch.
WAIT WHAT
DUDE
WHAT THE crap, MAN
ASSHOOOOLE
And now I got nothing. Ouch.
Alright, that's enough for the first update. Next time!
Skeletons! Degraded bosses! And cubes! CUBES!